Gekko wrote:I already do. The nose is open for the first time in years, infections haven't yet returned as the cavities inside my head now have air conditioning and hopefully my stomach and asthma will get better as there is no more infectious growth going down my throat.
Well that sounds pretty good at least. I didn't realise it had been that bad, congrats on getting that fixed!
Why stress over a wedding? It's nothing else but a ceremony, and should be fun. Ignore what your relatives think, ignore how it will seem outside. Simply have something that will be enjoyable and stick in your memories. I never understood why people must invite 1000 people (a small Indian wedding has 1000 people I hear) and celebrate for 3 days. That's not how I would announce my undying love for someone. This is naturally an opinion, and I never understood why my late mother wanted to organize a huge party after I graduated from high school. Then again, she seemed to want to do that, so I let her do that. Maybe a wedding is not about you, but your relatives? I dunno.
Draxas has some of it, but I think there's actually two parts in there. Keep in mind that this is just my opinion though. The wedding ceremony is for the bride and groom. It's a public display of the love you feel for each other. You don't need
to have a public display if you don't want to. In this day and age you don't need to get married at all, you can just love each other and stay together. If you do decide to do it, you can do it in a secular fashion, at a temple or a church or anything you like. You can celebrate your love in private at any time, but IMO the wedding ceremony is where you invite all your friends and family to witness your public celebration of it. It's a way to invite them into your life and show them what you have. Maybe it is just a ceremony, but sometimes words and actions matter more when you do them out in the open for all to see.
The second part is the actual celebration. Again in my opinion, that's a feast for the relatives and friends. That's inviting them to celebrate with you, giving them the chance to say that they love you and care for you. Sure, you could do it one relative and friend if you wanted to. But it's also a way for the families to get to know each other. it's not just that we're family after that, it's that she is a part of mine and I am a part of hers. they deserve a chance to get to know each other as well as just us. And if we invite them to a party, we'd be poor hosts if we didn't want them to have a good time. Sure the party is to celebrate our marriage, but it is so that they celebrate it. We can do that any day we want. And if the aprty is for them, it's important that they enjoy it. If we're going to spend money on a party, at least it should be money well spent.
On a crasser level, while blood runs thick it isn't syrup. If you don't foster relationships with your family, they'll disappear just as friends you ignore for years on end. Showing them that you care enough about them that you want them to be present at one of the most important events of your life is also important for the relationship you have. After all, they do the same for you as well. Often we take family for granted right up until we realize that they are no longer there.